His Higher Mind - Ryan David Arthur

March 6, 1977 to December 24, 2013

In life, and death…

Sometimes I wish Ryan back, and then I realize there’s just no way in hell (literally and figuratively). I realize I’m just feeling sorry for myself. He’s in a better place.

Still, hold you in my heart every day.
And I will find you again.

don’t you cherish me to sleep
never keep your eyelids clipped
hold me for the pops and clicks
I was only for the father’s crib

hair, old, long along
your neck onto your shoulder blades
always keep that message taped
cross your breasts you won’t erase
I was only for your very space

hip, under nothing
propped up by your other one, face ‘way from the sun
just have to keep a dialogue
teach our bodies: haunt the cause
I was only trying to spell a loss

joy, it’s all founded
pincher with the skin inside
you pinned me with your black sphere eyes
you know that all the rope’s untied
I was only for to die beside

so it’s storming on the lake
little waves our bodies break

there’s a fire going out,
but there’s really nothing to the south

swollen orange and light let through
your one piece swimmer stuck to you

sold, I’m Ever
open ears and open eyes
wake up to your starboard bride
who goes in and then stays inside
oh the demons come, they can subside

Happy Earth Birthday Ryan!


VIDEO of Ryan in Lilydale: Ryan Lilydale
“Purple, and purple, and purple — you look so royal.” Ryan and I had such a friendly and authentic relationship. He was very much himself around me, and he developed a strength that I’m glad I got a chance to nurture and witness. I strongly believe Ryan was a King, knight, or at the very least a court jester in King Arthur’s court (past life, of course!). Ryan means the Little Prince. I just love his voice. I think a great voice, speaks of a great person, and he had one. I love you!

You say that time can’t heal
The broken heart you stole
I don’t know what’s real

You are what I can’t be
You are what I can’t be

You say that time can’t heal
The broken heart you stole
I don’t know what’s real

You are what I can’t feel
You are what I can’t feel

Oh, something in my heart
Something in my heart
Makes me miss you more

Oh, something in my heart
Something in my heart
Makes me miss you more

Say that time can’t heal
The broken heart you stole
I don’t know what’s real
I don’t know what’s real

You are what I can’t feel
Oh something in my heart
Something in my heart
Makes me miss you more

Oh oh oh
Something in my heart
Something in my heart
Makes me miss you more

Oh oh oh
Something in my heart
Something in my heart
Makes me miss you more

Oh oh oh
Something in my heart
Still you’re in my heart
Makes me miss you more
Oh oh oh

Ooh, ooh

Something in my heart
Something in my heart
Makes me miss you more

Oh, something in my heart
Something in my heart
Makes me miss you more

Oh, something in my heart
Still you’re in my heart
Makes me miss you more

Oh, something in my heart
Still you’re in my heart
Makes me miss you more

Oh, something in my heart
Still you’re in my heart
Makes me miss you more

Read more: Röyksopp – Something In My Heart Lyrics | MetroLyrics

Coldplay: A Sky Full of Stars

My love, you’re in a sky full of stars. <3

Chris Martin March 2, 1977
Ryan Arthur March 6, 1977

When I miss you, I sometimes listen to interviews of Chris Martin.
You and he share similar birthdays (astrology) so have a similar energy, and his band was one of your favorites. This song is his favorites on the Ghosts album, which was recorded in 2013/2014. I feel the album is in someway connected to you.

Ghost Stories is a spiritually driven album that revolves around two major themes mentioned by lead singer Chris Martin. The album explores the idea of past actions, and the effects they can have on your future and one’s capacity for Unconditional Love. To him, Ghost Stories represents “a journey learning about Unconditional Love” (as said in the televised Making of Ghost Stories with Fearne Cotton).
“ The idea of Ghost Stories, for me, was “how do you let the things that happen to you in the past – your ghosts – how do you let them affect your present and your future?” Because there was a time when I was feeling like they were going to drag me down and ruin my life, and the lives of those around me. I was very lucky to meet a very good sufi teacher who started to introduce the idea of “if you sit with your experiences and the things you’ve been through, they alchemize.” At the time he said that, I didn’t really know what that meant, but I trusted that it would work, and the more that I was learning about that, the more music just started flowing through.

Ryan used to be joke about transmogrifying. I said something about transforming or transmuting problems, and he was like, “How about transmogrification”? Lol He had a rare difference. He said there was no one like me too, and he meant that as a compliment. LOL
God, I miss TBM.

When I connect with you, you say you’re a part of the Sun. And one of the last bands you shared with me was: Empire of the Sun. I believe your energy is with the Sun, warming us.

Much love to you babe.

About Ryan & His Interests

ryan_fullRyan was 36 years old. Last time I measured Ryan, his human figure was 7 feet, he wore size 16-18 shoes (guess it depended on the type), size 16.5 – 17.5 neck, 36-38 inches by 36 inches pants, 38 inch chest, and 36 inch long arms. 36!

He was a big (and sometimes slender — his weight would fluctuate — we used to joke that he had two stomachs!) and tall man. I used to get a lot of his clothes and shoes from eBay, and Eddie Bauer was great too! He used to also go to Si Vous Plait sports. Still, some things needed to be custom made. He was special, in all ways.

He was very helpful, and didn’t think to ask for anything in return. He thought the best of people, and made people feel better about themselves. He wanted to see everyone succeed, and was quick to praise. Unfortunately, some people would take advantage of his good nature. I was very protective of him, and didn’t like to see that happen. Ryan was also very protective of anyone he loved. You could not say a bad word about someone he adored, or he would pounce. Ha!

Ryan was/is a Pisces Sun, Virgo Moon, Mercury Pisces, Venus Aries, Mars Aquarius, Saturn Leo, Jupiter Taurus, Neptune Sagittarius, Uranus Scorpio, and Pluto and North Node Libra. He was a 33/6 life path — a Master Healer. An INFP / INTP.

His Neptune, was in his 1st house. And he had Scorpio rising. He appeared to be a very gentle and mysterious man. And he was that, but he was also what I called a Spicy Pisces or Piries with that Aries and Aquarius Venus-Mars action!

Ryan was exceptionally intelligent, and so sometimes he could be a little arrogant in that he would wonder why you didn’t know what he knew. But once he settled in to the fact, that he’s just smarter than most of us, he would be incredibly patient and calm and helpful.

In relationships, and social situations Ryan had been coming into his own. When I first met him, he was very quiet and often blurted out inappropriate things. But as time went on, I shared what I knew of human nature and how to approach difficult situations. He ended up becoming an amazing telephone sales manager, who was adored by his clients for his communication style.




Ryan’s favorite animal. He also identified with wolves. He said he was like the wolf, mating for life with me.

Ryan had a variety of interests (many of which, we shared — an amazing best friend this Girl has ever had!):

Sports, Gambling, & Games: Archery, Hockey (and doing fantasy hockey picks), Rollerblading, Frisbee (he was really impressed with his older brother and his love of Frisbee Golf). Frankly, Ryan was willing to try out anything that allowed him to move. He loved moving. He enjoyed Chess, Backgammon, Scrabble, Uno, Card games, Train sets, Video Games (WOW, Minecraft, and more!). Nature! Ryan loved wolves. And he loved the outdoors. Ryan wanted to pilot a plane, and race cars; however, his height often limited what he could do in these areas. He really was a physical man — especially with Venus Aries, in his 5th house.
Creativity: Writing poetry and short stories, making up words or funny ways to express things (like a filing cabinet was referred to as a brief case), guitar playing, singing, origami, and taking video. I also introduced him to drawing, painting, and working with clay. I’ll post his paintings, pictures, and more as time goes on.
Movies & TV Shows: Ryan enjoyed a lot of fantasy, sci-fi, speculative fiction, adventure, comedy, dark artistic films and tv shows. He wanted to be like Sean Connery, but I said, “You’re the best. Why be like Sean Connery, when you have your own special mojo going on?” 🙂 Heavy Metal, the movie. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZMNjdCel8L8 / https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aIJK0JNVvYM

Books: Ryan loved reading fiction. Especially speculative fiction. I introduced him to the Terry Pratchett series. I loved reading with him. He was truly adorable when he was comfortable, and he was pretty good at getting comfortable. God,I miss him.
Music: Ryan had eclectic tastes. His recent favorites were. I met him loving U2 – he was making a Mixed Video for Tanya — one of his friends, that he had a crush on! Ryan and his crushes. hehe (I’ll list out his music later).
Food & Drink: The finest wine, whiskey, cheese, and chocolates. He loved cooking AND baking. He would make a mean flourless chocolate cake, inspired by me needing to diet and get off carbs! I gifted him a cooking class. He was hooked! Oh, and GANGA! hehe… He loved Salad King’s Orange Beef dish and Warrior Chicken Rice Box from Freshii. He loved trying out new drinks, dishes, and restaurants. He had a taste for fine fast foods, and gourmet restaurants. I suggested he check out Ruth Chris steak house. He very much liked that too. He also loved Turkish Delight, Fruit jellys (the English kind), and butter tarts. He sure had a sweet tooth. But he was also very much a pizza and wings kind of guy. We had this telepathic connection. I’d say: Honey, do you want to order pizza? And he’d say, “I’m already ordering online”. LOL 🙂 Loved gløgg
Computers: Being a Pisces Sun-Mercury, with Aquarius Mars (in the house of networking) — Ryan was a natural at figuring out how computers worked, as well as the language of electronics. He was proud to have made Sudoko games, and worked on a Facebook game. He had great ideas, even though sometimes he would push a bit too much for them to be implemented. But that was Ryan — hard to be that smart! Ha! 🙂
The Occult: Ryan was an investigator at heart. He loved the idea of being a Forensic Specialist. He was an accomplished and sought after reader of tarot cards (his grandmother purchased his first deck around the age of seven), astrology, palm (The Palminator LOL), numerology, and more.
Women: Ryan adored women. I imagine that arose because he adored his mother so much. She represented a powerful and intelligent being that he could look up to. Women were smart, and he loved and revered that. Ryan was a bit of feminist and wanted to empower women — especially women who were less confident and/or ignorant of their gifts. Ryan used to cover my ears, when a siren wailed by. He was so kind, and sweet. He knew how much that hurt my ears, and he was always quick to bring me comfort.
Travel: Ryan really wanted to travel a lot more, but with Saturn in the 9th house of long distance travel — it was often hard to go far. We went to Cozumel for our Honeymoon and he was in heaven. And in July 2013, he made it out to Italy and other places. We did a lot of local weekend getaways to Niagara Falls, and took in the sites and sounds of the falls, nature, and wineries. We also got to travel to Montreal, on business. Great times!
Random bits: Kuala bears, kids toys, puzzles. His favorite colors were green and orange. He had a strong interest in Asian culture. He was a physical healer. Anyone who got a chance to get physically close to him, could feel a very strong energy emitting from him.

Dreams Ryan’s dreams were plenty. The mission statement, we came up for him, was: Creating original futures by expanding realities, and empowering minds. One day back in 2004, we were hanging out at a playground, and I asked him: If you could do anything you wanted to, right now, without education or money being an issue, what would you do? And he said he would found a colorful play space for executives. Ryan wanted to get his MBA, and he was trying to work on that, towards the end of his life. I always encouraged him to pursue business, as I could see the latent leader in him.

He loved cuddling, hugging, massaging, being cuddled, hugged, and massaged. He was truly a sensuous, romantic, and physical man — as well as having a brilliant higher mind. <3

(Note: There is so much more. I’ll keep adding to this post, as time goes on).

These are interests Ryan recorded once:

(to be continued), art, beauty, chaos, cryptography, curiousity, dreaming, experimenting, exploring, intelligence, knowledge, learning, movies with character, music, philosophy, poetry, reading, rhythm and soul

Ryan Sightings & Visits

And so it BEGINS… The dead come back to their Earth home, on and near the anniversary of their release…

December 8, 2014


Went out to the elevator of our building, saw a man waiting for it. Wasn’t sure if I knew him or not. He pointed back to my apartment and asked if my husband was there. I told him he passed away last December. He didn’t seem shocked or anything or offer condolences. Then he said about two weeks ago he saw something that looked like Ryan and he asked the guy if he lived in this building but he said no. I told him he hasn’t lived here since summer of 2012. And not too many men are seven feet tall. We then got on the elevator, and I noticed he was wearing an Indian beaded necklace. I asked if he was first nations, or native. He said, yes. From get this, New Brunswick and he’s part Mi’maq. And he just found the necklace in the laundry room (he was on his way back to the laundry room). We talked a little bit about spirits. His wife passed away last year. And he said something about he was told he would meet a young girl (referring to me). I was a little spooked. I never recall seeing that guy before, and yet he apparently lives on the same floor as me. Ryan is very active on planet Earth right now. He passed on December 24th, 2013. Oh, and another story. My sister Lisa messaged me the other day saying she saw someone who reminded her of Ryan, and she began painting with orange and green — his two favorite colors. And she told me she missed him. He was her “yo bro”. I’ve been seeing Ryan’s all over the place too lately…

Also, I was checking to see if any of my old cell phones worked, so I could send one to my mom as a “camera” and I found some interesting text messages from Ryan on them.

Here’s one…. He randomly texted me this:

August 29, 2013

Char Margolis is on breakfast television talking about intuitive classes she is doing. She is psychic. She is from Michigan. LOL She is a medium and doing a medium reading. Trying to do a reading. Very general read. I see an m m m… is your husband advancing his career? Yes. We really don’t die we cross over to another dimension.

This was a random text at around 7am. It was totally out of the blue. We used to joke about mediums faking. So that’s why he’s poking here, and of course he knew I would get what he was talking about. And I think Ryan has come back home (Earth) — this dimension to re-connect with friends and family so don’t be surprised if Ryan is on your mind or if you thought you saw him,  or if someone oddly mentions him.

These links have interesting information about life after death / life after death.

December 6, 2014

ryan arthur coke bottle

JUST had an interesting experience. Went down to the store, to look for a coke bottle with the names on it (see previous Ryan coke post) and on the way back ran into a man I bump into all the time (he’s a Sag, but the first time I met him he told me he was a Pisces)… He said, “I remember you” and I’m like, “Yeah, I’m the Leo — you’re the Sag” but then he said, “I’ve seen you with the tall man”… and I’m like… a) I never remember seeing this man with Ryan, and b) I have talked with this man many times over the past year and he never mentioned Ryan before. and c) Ryan passed away last year…

I told him that Ryan past away last December. He said, “What from”… I said, “Apparently heart related”. He got all freaky. He then told me that he just got back from the hospital to check for blockages of the heart… that he had radioactive iodine put in and while the doctor said there isn’t much to worry about right now, the Sag wasn’t so sure. He said he was under a lot of stress. and felt like he could die tomorrow.

I talked to him a little about my philosophy… he said, “do you like Sci-fi”… lol… I said yes…and thought, “oh he’s a skeptic and making a joke about my philosophy being sci-fi fantasy… lol… but I’ll tell him anyway… I told him that I thought this is a prison planet and when our time is up, it’s up and we’re in hell right now and heaven awaits so just ease into it… It’s not really a bad thing for us… for those we leave behind, yes… but not for us… all our pain should melt away… I told him what I thought Ryan might say, because he was so good at calming nerves and accepting what was to come. And he was into speculative fiction.

And the Sag told me that he has cured problems before with laughter… after reading Catch 22, apparently…

And then he got all freaky and said, “You’re not an angel of death, are you”? And I said, “No, I’m an angel of life” and I was just joking about that, of course… I wanted him to feel better… And he gave me a hug. Was he trying to pass over his death to me? Yikes!

And then he thanked me for being there, and said that I was an angel (I mean, not being sweet but a real angel) and it was serendipity that we met tonight and that I SAVED him… partly because I reminded him HOW to cure himself. Huh… And this, after I did some unsuccessful meditative work about my health. Hmmm… Can’t make this stuff up, but it did take a bit to write out.

The Big Man (Ryan) is definately in the house.

December 2015

I was cycling around Sherbourne and Bloor, and suddenly I saw this man walk towards me. Same height, size, and walking cadence as Ryan. I couldn’t believe it. He was sweating a bit, in the way Ryan sweat. A worried look. I honestly thought Ryan still might be alive, so I followed him to his car and I really wanted to approach him, but thought it might be too weird. I took a picture, to show a friend, because I couldn’t believe it. But we decided although it was a doppleganger, it wasn’t Ryan. A close model. A hello from the other side.



Ryan's 30th Birthday Party Celebration w/ Belly Dancer

Ryan’s life was filled with daily music.

Music helps to define a person. What is music? Personality? Knowing? Music is certain. Certainly good. Understand music: ~ Ryan Arthur

http://youtu.be/S3yYCFjGJNw | http://youtu.be/P3ulheTtDeo | http://youtu.be/RZkZNehJs7I

YouTube | Songza

This is one of the last bands Ryan shared with me: Empire of the Sun. The words have some other worldly about them. They brought me a lot of joy listening to them.

He learned of this band, through our doctor.

Posted October 4, 2010 on Facebook

Xymox – Crossing The Water 🙁

Posted December 2013: Blue Tente feat. Stine Grove – Heading home 🙁

Bands, Artists, Musicians

  • Blueman group
  • U2
  • Gregorian chants
  • Nightwish
  • Songza

Sounds & Moving Pictures

I’ll be adding some audio and video of Ryan, in the coming days, weeks, months, and years. I’m so happy that I captured him, in so many everyday and work scenarios. I simply adored him.

I’ve just set up a YouTube space for his videos under Ryan J. Arthur – the middle initial J. stands for Jasper — his psychic reading name. 😀

Foreshadowing… :(

Ryan knew his time was drawing to a close.
He was so tormented with the Forum of Five. At least he finally got rid of the sixth, that showed up in 2012. What a sweet soul.

He posted this November 13, 2013


The world seems not the same
Though I know nothing has changed

It’s all my state of mind
I can’t leave it all behind
I have to stand up to be stronger

I have to try
To break free
From the thoughts in my mind
Use the time that I have
I can say goodbye
Have to make it right
Have to fight
‘Cause I know in the end it’s worthwhile
That the pain that I feel slowly fades away
It will be all right

I know
I should realize
Time is precious
It is worthwhile
Despite how I feel inside
Have to trust it’ll be alright
Have to stand up to be stronger


Oh, this night is too long
Have no strength to go on
No more pain I’m floating away

Through the mist I see the face
Of an angel, calls my name
I remember you’re the reason I have to stay


It’s the TBM (The Big Man’s) Birthday Today

I ran into a comedian, online at around 4:30pm, by the name of Stephen Merchant. I suspect that’s around the time when Ryan was released. On this day (Dec 24, 2013), last year, he sent me a message at 11:12am telling me about what areas were hit with the power outages from the fateful ice storm. At 11:05 he said, “I’m good.” and that he was “stranded for now”. He didn’t mention anything about feeling ill. And he was using a back-up generator.  He had a penchant for falling asleep at his chair, like his dad did – so he could have had some lunch and then fell asleep at his chair for hours. Unfortunately he had sleep paralysis, which was frightening to him. At 10:22am he asked if I was okay. He was very loving, and kindly — especially at the end of his life on Earth. I’m so grateful for everything he brought in, and took out of my life. Anyway, back to the video. Ryan is 7 feet, and in this show — the comedian is 6′7 and he’s talking about how it is to be that height. What I love about this comedian is that he wears glasses, is English, and is a little awkward so Ryan would have really loved this guy. And so I think this is Ryan’s way of communicating, and saying, “I’m here Luv” and also to “watch a show”. lol

Anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHOCO… wherever you are… *muah*

Ryan Quotes

Ryan was very much about “original thinking” and that’s how we came up with OrangeTHINK.

Original thought is the waterfall of life. Often the reservoir of knowledge is recycled, re-used & re-tweeted as original. -Me (Ryan Arthur)

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